Selections from the J. Mysteryman Catalog

Second Sight


“WHY IS THERE NEVER A PHOTOGRAPHER AROUND WHEN YOU NEED ONE!!! THEY’RE ALWAYS HERE BEGGING FOR HANDOUTS BUT NEVER TO BE SEEN WHEN THERE’S A JOB TO DO!”

“Easy, JJJ,” I said.  “I’m here for you.  And I’ve got my Nikon D3X with me.  With 24.5 megapixels,  exceptional noise control, and Nikon’s EXPEED image-processing system, it’ll get whatever pictures you need, better than you could hope for.”

“SHUT IT, PARKER!  THE RHINO’S IN MIDTOWN MAKING A WRECK OF THE PLACE AND I NEED THAT NEAR INSTANTANEOUS SHUTTER RELEASE TIME LAG OF APPROXIMATELY 0.04 SECONDS AND  51-POINT AUTOFOCUS SYSTEM TO GET DOWN THERE AND GET PICTURES!”

I swung by Midtown and there was my odd-toed ungulate.  I got in close and started snapping pics when he saw me.

“Parker!,”  Rhino yelled.  “If you’re here then that spider-creep can’t be far away.  If you take one more picture, even the durable, lightweight magnesium-alloy construction and comprehensive weather
sealing won’t stop me from tearing that camera into a million pieces.

The camera cost $7400, but I took the picture anyway.*

Camera only available in black.  Strap available in any color, sold separately.

* Apologies to Frank Miller
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