Professor X… Secrets

Some times when I'm feeling down, Beast sits me in front of a mirror, wraps a furry arm around my head and says, "Who's the cool cat with the blue 'fro?"

SECRET…

I *could* grow a beard. I just don't want to be a douche like a certain wheelchair bound douche bag...cough Chief cough, cough .

SECRET…

You're always talking about dating birds, Daltry. Come back when you've done the deed with a girl with feathers...poser.

SECRET…

Know why I gave up the floating yellow chair? Magneto kept calling me Chris Pike. He should be called the master of douchery.

SECRET…

The great irony of my life has nothing to do with Magneto, David, or the line of women I've failed to commit to. My family made its fortune in shampoo.

SECRETS!