Cobra Commander — Secrets!

The snake is a great metaphor...Phor gettin' bitches back to my crib!

Secrets…

My most evil world domination plan yet: Game of Thrones.

Secrets…

I'm responsible for 7 of the last 9 songs that only describe how to do a dance.

Secrets…

I've got 80% of the Republican candidates on my payroll. Ron Paul refuses to see the light, though.

Secrets…

People really don't understand the burden of leading a terrorist organization...And staying trim enough to fit into this jumpsuit.

SECRETS!!!

The LIST

Dr. Doom, Dr. Light, Dr. Sivana. What do these doctors put in their waiting rooms? What do villains of all sorts read to keep up with the latest news and trends in super villainy? Wonder no more gentle reader. We’ve got the answer in this week’s list.

Super Villain Trade Periodicals

Taking Over the USA Today!

Modern Henchman

Better Lairs and Dungeons

Popular Mad Science

Southern Dying

Gentlevillains Quarterly

Organic Laboratory

LIFE (for the incarcerated villain)

Sneak

Living on the Lam on the Cheap

Heist

Bad Housekeeping

Sportsmaster Illustrated

Villainess’s Home Journal

SuperCrime DiY

AAVP Bulletin (American Association of Villainous People)

Pillage Voice