Dream Team

With IDW, Dynamite, and BOOM!, and others buying up properties and converting them into comics, this installment is going to be a series of suggestions: properties that should be comics. So strap yourself into your bathtub for a taste of adventure.

1. Dolemite – the solar system became a spiritually poorer place when Rudy Ray Moore passed away last year. Jesse and I had the chance to meet him at the world premier of “Dolemite 2000.” I shook his hand, but was too awed to say anything coherent. In honor of that we begin with what would be an ideal property to revive: Dolemite. Pimps and ho’s are in style, and no one is pimpier than Dolemite. Whether he is rolling down a hill butt-naked to escape a girl’s father/ sheriff, tussling with Mean Willie Green, or spreading the word at his club The Total Experience, Dolemite is a force of nature.  In an ideal world, Moore would co-plot and write the dialogue. Unfortunately, dead means dead. So, let’s say Bendis and ODB co-ploting with the majority of the dialogue supplied by ODB. Why Bendis? Let’s face it, his Luke Cage revamp in Alias is the closest we’ve come to cloning Dolemite. Why Ol’ Dirty Bastard? Really…do you have to ask? The art chores are a tough call…I don’t know…Rob Liefeld? (ADDENDUM: Jesse points out that ODB is dead also. His suggestion of RZA is a good substitute.)

2. Milo and Otis – In the last few years, we’ve seen a resurgence of animal books. Owly and Corgi spring to mind immediately. These are cute books where animals do cute things and philosophize cutely. Imagine a James Kochalka written and drawn book. Checkout Monkey vs. Robot or Pinky and Stinky; your life will be better for it. Kochalka knows this realm of cute surreality. Besides, Milo and Otis having cute adventures is something we need more of in this life. ‘Nuff said.

3. They Might be Giants – Comics and popular music often intermingle. Think of the glorious Kid ‘n Play that Marvel published back in the ’90’s. Not to mention the many bio-books that have covered everyone from K.I.S.S. to New Kids on the Block. The world of John Flansburgh and John Linnell is ideal for comic book treatment. A blend of action/adventure and funny book, this book would be best drawn by Michael Kupperman (of Snake ‘n Bacon and Tales Designed to Thrizzle fame). A close second would be Keith Giffen and J. M. DeMatteis on script with Kevin MacGuire on art.

4. Anything from the minds of Sid and Marty Kroft. I have what some would call an unnatural love of H.R. Puffinstuff, and with “Land of the Lost” bringing exposure to the Kroft brothers, it’s a crime that there aren’t associated books. Only one of three people could do justice to the catalogue of Kroftian craziness: Tony Millionaire, Peter Bagge, or Michael Kupperman. These guys know crazy shit.

That’ll wrap up another session of the Dream Team. What properties would you like to see turned into comic books? Who would you have working on them? What are some of your dream teams in general? Feel free to post in the comments section.